The Little Devil's
by babylove969
Summary: Deeks is forced to take an undercover operation that can only be clasified as a suicide mission. Full summary inside with Warnings.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Ok so I've never written a fanfic for NCIS- Los Angeles before so bear with me here. This idea is stuck in my head so I'm going to write it the characters might not be perfect gonna do my best to get them right but there may be some OC in this. Like all my stories this will be dark and violence filled definitely lots of pain and torture and even some sexual material. Definitely not for the soft stomach readers._

_Summary: Deeks has been with the NCIS as a liaison for a year now. However, that all changes when he gets a call from his Lieutenant giving him no choice but to go deep undercover for one of the most dangerous drug cartels they have ever come across. Now He is forced to cut ties with NCIS and go completely alone on what only could be considered a suicide mission._

Chapter 1

It had been a fairly easy day for the NCIS team. They didn't have any open cases so they were just doing some paperwork to catch up on backlog. Sam and Callen had spent some time training in the gym trying to avoid their own paperwork. The day went by pretty fast considering all of the tedious paperwork each agent had to go through. Deeks was moaning half way through the day about how he has twice the paperwork for he had to still do paperwork for his position in LAPD and for NCIS. Which only brought on the conversation from Kensi about why he doesn't just join NCIS so he didn't have to bounce back and forth between the two. Deeks replied the same thing as he always does because he was a cop. He had to admit it did flatter him when Hetty had handed him the papers for him to join NCIS as an agent. He would be crazy not to take the opportunity the problem was he didn't know if he was ready. It was one thing to be an undercover detective it was a whole other thing to be an agent. They worked differently and it had taken him a year to fully understand how each one worked. In the agent world Deeks was the weaker in that area, but in the undercover world he was one of the best LAPD has. The idea of switching made him excited sure but it also made him nervous and scared to give up that part of his life. He had been in that unit for six years almost now it was who he was to just walk away from that seemed wrong. However, at the same time there have been many times when he came back from an operation when he just wanted to walk away a quit.

Over the six years he had been forced to witness horrible things being done to women, men and children. He's worked undercover with some of the most dangerous criminals LA had. He's had to act in ways he never would have otherwise and done things that went against everything he stood for. There were many times when he finished an operation and he went home and got completely drunk just to try and forget. Kensi had found that out once about six months back she had came over to his place after finding out that Deeks was back from his operation. She went over to his house to find him completely wasted out of his mind trying to drown the memories that seemed to be burned into his mind. He had been in a human trafficking ring for the past three months. The operation was taking young girls from Mexico and bringing them up and selling them to the highest bidder. Deeks' job was to infiltrate the organization and he had but by doing so he had witnessed innocent little girls being raped and beaten. The worst part was being stuck watching it happen and not being able to step in and protect them. Deeks always had a soft spot for children how could he not after his own childhood. Kensi had spent the night with him being there for her partner after a horrible operation took its toll on him. The next morning Kensi acted like everything was fine and nothing happened trying to help her partner get back into the normal life they live each day. She didn't know first hand what it was like to be deep undercover for months at a time, but she could assume that the best thing for him was to get back to a normal life so he could move on from it. So that's what she did she acted like he hadn't been away for three months that it was just a normal everyday thing. Sam and Callen had an idea of how it felt to be deep undercover for a longer period of time than just a few days so they asked him if he was okay once after that they went back to how they would act every day. Deeks had been with them for a year and even though he rubbed Sam the wrong way from time to time due to the extreme difference in personalities he still felt that brotherly bond with him. Sam and Callen were both older than Deeks and they knew he could handle himself out in the field and protect Kensi. That didn't mean that he wouldn't be affected by undercover work. Especially after all the years he had been doing it and for Sam and Callen they could admit to themselves that where undercover work was concerned Deeks did have them beat. He had been doing it longer and quite honestly he was better at it. They had seen him first hand being able to come up with an alias at a drop of a hat and keep up that alias for extended periods of time. Which was impressive to both Sam and Callen.

It was finally the end of the day and time to go home. Sam and Callen had already made their way out the door talking about who was buying dinner tonight. Kensi had been saying her goodbye to Deeks who was sticking around to finish reports that was due to LAPD tomorrow morning. Kensi just told him to have fun and not to fry his brain as she left the building. An hour later Hetty, Eric and Nell had also left leaving him alone in the building. Which he didn't mind it was exactly the first time it had happened after all he always had extra paperwork and deadlines to meet them the rest of them. It was seven o'clock when he had finally finished and as he stood up to leave his phone rang. The noise echoed in the silence of the building. Deeks saw that it was his lieutenant that was calling and he found himself hoping it wasn't another operation and this was just about the paperwork that was past due.

"Hello Lue"

"Hello Detective."

"Look if this is about the paperwork that's past due I just finished it and was going to drop it off tomorrow morning."

"That's not why I'm calling. I have a new assignment for you."

"What is it this time?"

"As I'm sure you have heard LAPD has been working this drug cartel known as The Little Devils for two years now. We've sent in a total of thirty-five detectives undercover and each time they get dropped off out front of the precinct dead. All have been brutally tortured and unrecognizable it's also the only indication that we had that they were dead. Our last detective that we sent in showed up yesterday morning now they have taken thirty-six of our men from us. We can't let this go this cartel is responsible for one hundred million dollars in drug and arms trafficking in LA a year. They are the biggest drug lords we have and they need to be shut down. I'm sending you in to get this job done."

Deeks couldn't believe it his own lieutenant wanted to send him in on an operation that was responsible for thirty-six dead cops. All of which he was certain had their covers blown considering they ended up in front of the police station. He had heard of The Little Devils before they were run by a crazy Latino named Jose Martinez he was beyond insane. He had heard some of the other cops talking about them while they were investigating them before sending anyone in. They work with drugs mostly heroin and they sell heavy firearms to anyone with the money that can afford them. The leader Jose hosts parties where his idea of fun is getting drunk and high then torturing some innocent girl or boy whichever he felt like. The man was the devil in every sense of the word. He had seen some of the detectives that came back dead they were beaten beyond recognition one almost didn't have enough teeth left for a dental comparison. All of them that Deeks knew about had high levels of heroin in their systems which was forced into them. The longest any detective had lasted was three months some didn't make it past the first week. It had nothing to do with talent they were good undercover detectives it had everything to do with what connections this cartel had; and obviously they had someone high up on the inside to get that many blown covers. There was no way in hell that he would go in there.

"No way I mean no disrespect Lue but you're insane to put anyone else in there. Thirty-six dead cops that's beyond past the point where you stop. You telling me you don't have anything you can use to hold them?"

"It's all circumstantial nothing will hold up in court."

"But that's enough to get a warrant then you search every building they have find the drugs or guns. All you need is enough to hold them for seventy-two hours even their lawyers can't get them out with their records. Get a warrant and use those three days to get what you need."

"We don't have that information we don't have all the building locations or who they have connections with. Busting them for drugs isn't enough to shut down their operation someone else will just take over."

"Someone will always be there to take over for these cartels just like all the others you know that. Thirty-six dead you can't honestly think I'm just going to go in there especially blind with no one there as backup in case I get into trouble."

"Look Detective you know that I can't order you into doing this. I can however, tell you that if you don't do this then I will have no choice but to fire you. Except I won't just fire you I'll make it so that you can't work with any other agency there is or law firm. So you can say no but that will mean you spend the rest of your life working minimum wage dead end jobs. Now you have the choice if you choose to go undercover you will do so completely alone and you will sever all ties with NCIS. I can't risk someone in LAPD knowing that you're going undercover so the alias and backstopping you'll have to do yourself. You will get rid of this phone and use the phone that I have placed in the package in your mailbox. You will use it and only it to contact me with information or if your life is in danger."

"You want me to go in this operation completely alone no one but you will know I'm even in there and you just think NCIS is going to let that slide? That they won't come looking for me for an explanation why I'm all of a sudden gone?"

"No you will give them an explanation. You will be handing in your resignation giving them the reason that you can't do the work anymore. That all of this pressure has been too much for you so you're going to leave for a while and get out of town. I'm sure Hetty over there will be calling me and I will tell them the same thing that you took time off here as well."

"You think they will just up and believe that? Not only that I'm supposed to backstop this alias Jose will look into my background it needs to be flawless. Eric is the best tech he's my only shot and having a perfect background that will hold up to their digging. You want this cartel I get that but NCIS can help you get them I can talk to them tomorrow and explain what's going on. It's not their area but I know they won't say no to something this huge and dangerous. Don't let this be personal Lue let them help."

"This is personal thirty-six dead cops on my precinct doorstep is very much personal detective. This stays with LAPD no one else knows about this but LAPD. I am the only one that knows the location of these cartels all of their information that we have managed to get on them is in that package in your mailbox. Once you read it you will burn it and leave no trace what so ever. Either you are a detective or you are nothing so decide what it will be."

"This is a suicide operation you know that."

"You've dealt with cartels before and you've survived you are one of the best undercover detectives that I have. That doesn't mean there are not a hundred more men that stand behind you ready to take your place. You are not irreplaceable detective so don't make that mistake in thinking you are. You and I both know you'll do this because you're a cop first. If I don't hear from Hetty tomorrow then I'll know you refused to go. Which then I will make sure you have nothing left do not cross me detective."

Before Deeks could say anything his lieutenant hung up the phone. Deeks placed his cell phone down on his desk he noticed how his hands were shaking from the rage that was going through his entire body. Somewhere along the way in the conversation Deeks had stood up and started to pace now he was leaned over his desk with both hands on the side. He was trying his best to calm himself down he couldn't believe this was happening. His own lieutenant had just given him the ultimatum of going on a suicide mission or to lose everything he has if he refused to go. He didn't know what to do his mind was completely blinded by rage that was flowing through his body. He couldn't help it he grabbed a mug that was sitting on his desk and threw it across the room. Glass shattering could be heard throughout the quiet building. He let out a cry of rage trying to get his mind back under control, but he was so furious he didn't even know what to do. He knew he had no choice but that didn't mean he wouldn't be enraged about having to make this decision. To be honest he didn't even know where to start he had to come up with an alias, make a backstop and get a fake ID to go with it. There was always someone in LAPD that did that and when he was here it was Eric. He knew whatever he did wouldn't really stand up that well if anyone wanted to tear it apart. He couldn't let NCIS know though, however if Eric happened to come across something on his computer it would be natural for him to look into it.

Deeks went upstairs to where Eric's computer was. He signed in under his ID he knew whatever was typed into this computer was recorded Eric would find out in the morning that someone had been on the system. Deeks knew it was a long shot but he was hoping between the resignation letter and if Eric stumbled upon his new alias them they would understand. If they understood hopefully Eric will go over the backstop and correct it if something is wrong, Deeks came up with a new alias a man named James Denver, he was a thirty-three year old man who spent most of his life going in and out of prison for assault and drug related charges. His plan was to go in as a body guard so he made the alias have connections to other dead drug dealers that he worked for as their body guards. After four hours and a strong appreciation to what Eric does for them on a daily basis he was finished. He had prison records and juvi records for different charges; he had his new fake ID and a new identity. Now all he needed was the package that was in his mailbox and a new car and some cash. He was hoping that his Lieutenant would at least thought of that so he wouldn't have to worry about that part of this operation if not he would have to figure that out tonight and go from there.

Deeks then signed off and made his way downstairs back to his own computer where he would type up his letter. He sat there staring at the screen for easily twenty minutes trying to think of something he would say. It wasn't easy having to fake wanting to leave when he didn't everything in him was screaming for him to call Hetty and tell her what was going on. He couldn't take the chance though that his Lieutenant was watching his phone calls one slip up and he would be in serious trouble. He also couldn't risk anyone in NCIS losing their jobs over this but Deeks was confident that Hetty would protect her agents like they were her children. Deeks really didn't want to leave he really didn't especially when he believed that he would be dying on this operation. That's what bothered him the most not that he would most likely die it was that he would die and they would never hear the truth from him. They might never even find out that he was dead and they would wonder about him and worry over his disappearance just like they did with Dom before him. He couldn't even let himself think about how Kensi would react to all of this she had lost Dom and now she was basically losing him as well. He knew this would drive her mad with worry especially not having any answers.

Finally he finished writing his resignation letter to Hetty he printed it off then placed it in an envelope and placed it on her desk for her to find when she came in. After grabbing his jacket he stood there for a moment to look around he couldn't help the water that came to his eyes as he looked around the place he was certain he would never see again. He had only been here a year but he felt like this was a place where he belonged where he had finally found a family. After letting out a breath he made his way out to his car so he could get home and finish getting his alias all set so he could leave tonight. After driving home he parked his car and made his way up to his mailbox inside was a large brown envelope and from the jingling he knew there was at least car keys inside of it. He made his way up to his home where he could open the envelope and get the info he needed. Once inside he sat down on the couch and opened the envelope inside it he found information on Jose Martinez and what LAPD had been able to get on the cartel organization. There was also a burn phone with only his Lieutenant's number, and a set of car keys along with directions to his new car. There was also a prepaid credit card with a post it note that said the maximum limit which was 50,000 that would allow him to get some clothes for his new alias, and a new car if the one his Lieutenant had given him wouldn't work. He wanted to go to sleep and try and get his mind ready but he knew that wouldn't be a good idea. If he was going to do this he had to get going he couldn't just sit here and wait around he had to get going. He got up and made his way into the bedroom and grabbed a duffle bag so he could put his new clothes into it. James Denver was a tough man one you didn't want to fuck with or he would take you out. He preferred to beat his opponent to a pulp instead of using a gun but he still had one in case the situation called for it. He wore tight shirts so his muscles showed and loose fitting jeans. He wore a red bandana around his head and he always wore a black leather jacket. He was a whisky drinker and he knew how to have a good time. Deeks grabbed some of his shirts that were tight fitting they also didn't look new so that made Deeks feel a little bit more comfortable. He would stop at a thrift store that he knew was still open to get a few other things like worn jeans. He already had a black leather jacket so that was taken care of he would also get a bottle of whisky to put in his bag as well as cigarettes and a lighter. Deeks wasn't too thrilled about having to smoke but with being in and out of prison is whole life that went hand in hand with smoking.

After getting his bag already he made his way back out into the living room so he could go over the directions to the car and burn the information. He sat down and went over the information five more times making sure it was committed to his memory he then turned his eyes to the directions to the car. It was in a vacant parking lot just a few blocks over so he could walk there easily enough. He was hoping the car wasn't a piece of shit and would work with his alias. He also needed a car that had some speed if he got into trouble and had to get out of there in a hurry. He grabbed all the papers and made his way into the kitchen. He put them in the sink then grabbed a BBQ lighter and lit the paper on fire he watched it to make sure it was completely burnt to ashes. Once the fire was gone he went back into the living room and put the credit card into his wallet with his new ID. He took his old ID out and placed it on the table next to his old cell phone. He pocketed his new burn phone and car keys then grabbed his bag and left.

He locked his door then placed his keys in the hide a key that he kept for reasons just as this. He knew he had to think of everything each time he went undercover you couldn't be caught with something that belonged to yourself. He made his way down the street to where the parking lot was he took his keys out and hit the unlock button on them to see which car responded. He was happy when it was a black mustang that responded and unlocked at least the car was fast and it matched his alias. Not having to trade the car in for something else was one last thing he had to worry about. Now all he had to do was go to the thrift store get some older jeans and get some whiskey and smokes then he could go. Deeks put his bag in the trunk then got into the driver seat. He opened the glove box first thing to see what the registration was and he glad to see there wasn't any in the car so hopefully he wouldn't get pulled over. Though he didn't have to worry about someone going through his car and finding the car registered under someone else's name. he turned the car on and made his way down to the thrift store that was open twenty-four hours for the homeless people to come in when they had the chance. He would go there first then head to the corner store for the rest of his supplies.

An hour later he was finished and had everything that his new alias needed so he then began to make his way down to where Jose Martinez operated out of. There was a bar that he and his men frequented at so tomorrow night he would go there and meet up with them and hopefully give them some incentive to invite him to join them. After all if there was one thing Deeks had learned over the years of undercover work it was that a drug cartel leader always needed more body guards. Now all Deeks had to do was pray that he makes it out of this alive.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It was nine in the morning and everyone was settling in for another day of work at the mission. Kensi wasn't surprised that Deeks hadn't shown yet she knew he had to drop off some paperwork down at LAPD. Kensi sat down at her desk sipping her coffee listening to Sam and Callen banter back and forth like they did every morning. With the exception of Deeks not being there everything was going just like every other day at the mission. That was until Hetty came over with a look that spoke of nothing good was to come. In her hand she was holding a piece of paper that was folded to letter size. Eric and Nell came down the stairs.

"Hetty I need to talk to you." Eric said

"One moment . Sometime last night after we all left Mr. Deeks handed in his letter of resignation to NCIS."

"What?" Kensi said

She couldn't believe this why would Deeks just randomly out of nowhere hand in his letter of resignation that just made no sense. Sam and Callen were both looking at each other trying to figure all of this out they didn't think that Deeks was having second thoughts about being within NCIS.

"Why would he just leave out of the blue?" Sam asked

"In his letter he states that he needs some time he is also taking a break from LAPD which I have confirmed with his Lieutenant this morning when I came in."

"You don't actually believe that though do you Hetty?" Callen asked

"No Mr. Callen I don't he wasn't showing any signs of needed some space or time off. He hadn't been on any operations that would have taken their toll on him recently. Something is obviously going on."

"I think I might have an idea." Eric said slowly his mind putting the information that he just heard and the information that he had gotten this morning when he signed on to his computer together.

"What do you mean Eric?" Kensi asked

"Come upstairs and I'll show you what I'm talking about."

They all followed Eric and Nell back upstairs to the op's center. Eric sat down at his desk and Nell did the same to hers. Eric put up records on the big screen so everyone could see.

"I came in this morning to find out that someone was on my computer late last night. So I went in to my system and I found these files that were made last night along with a driver license that was printed off. Now these are prison records and juvi records for a man named James Denver now at first glance they seem to be legit and authentic but if you go further into them there are holes that clearly show they were made up. Now who ever made these had basic knowledge of how to backstop but they aren't a pro at doing it suggesting that the person's only ever really done it a few times. Here is a picture of James Denver."

Eric clicked on the link and it opened a driver license that held Deeks picture on it. Everyone in the room was now putting the pieces together.

"He's going undercover." Sam said

"But if he's going undercover for LAPD why would they backstop an alias with holes?" Kensi asked

"That's the thing I don't think LAPD did the backstopping I think Deeks did it which is why it's on my computer. Why he didn't just ask me that is what I can't figure out I would have done it for him. What he did is basic and it gives me a good idea what he was going towards but it won't hold up if someone is looking deep into it."

" when was this done on your computer?" Hetty asked

"Someone logged on around eight last night and logged off around eleven."

"Pull up Mr. Deeks' cell phone log from last night before eight as well as the camera footage from the bullpen."

Eric went to work on pulling up Deeks' cell phone log as Nell worked on the footage from the bullpen last night. Once they had what they were asked for they put it up on the screen.

"Can you play the last call that he received last night as well as the video footage of the call. We need to see how he reacts." Hetty said

"Ok last call came in from an LAPD number give me a second to pull it up from the file. Okay got it. Ready?" Eric asked as he looked to Nell.

"Ready."

"_Hello Lue"_

"_Hello Detective."_

"_Look if this is about the paperwork that's past due I just finished it and was going to drop it off tomorrow morning."_

"_That's not why I'm calling. I have a new assignment for you."_

"_What is it this time?"_

"_As I'm sure you have heard LAPD has been working this drug cartel known as The Little Devils for two years now. We've sent in a total of thirty-five detectives undercover and each time they get dropped off out front of the precinct dead. All have been brutally tortured and unrecognizable it's also the only indication that we had that they were dead. Our last detective that we sent in showed up yesterday morning now they have taken thirty-six of our men from us. We can't let this go this cartel is responsible for one hundred million dollars in drug and arms trafficking in LA a year. They are the biggest drug lords we have and they need to be shut down. I'm sending you in to get this job done."_

"_No way I mean no disrespect Lue but you're insane to put anyone else in there. Thirty-six dead cops that's beyond past the point where you stop. You telling me you don't have anything you can use to hold them?"_

"_It's all circumstantial nothing will hold up in court."_

"_But that's enough to get a warrant then you search every building they have find the drugs or guns. All you need is enough to hold them for seventy-two hours even their lawyers can't get them out with their records. Get a warrant and use those three days to get what you need."_

"_We don't have that information we don't have all the building locations or who they have connections with. Busting them for drugs isn't enough to shut down their operation someone else will just take over."_

"_Someone will always be there to take over for these cartels just like all the others you know that. Thirty-six dead you can't honestly think I'm just going to go in there especially blind with no one there as backup in case I get into trouble."_

"_Look Detective you know that I can't order you into doing this. I can however, tell you that if you don't do this then I will have no choice but to fire you. Except I won't just fire you I'll make it so that you can't work with any other agency there is or law firm. So you can say no but that will mean you spend the rest of your life working minimum wage dead end jobs. Now you have the choice if you choose to go undercover you will do so completely alone and you will sever all ties with NCIS. I can't risk someone in LAPD knowing that you're going undercover so the alias and backstopping you'll have to do yourself. You will get rid of this phone and use the phone that I have placed in the package in your mailbox. You will use it and only it to contact me with information or if your life is in danger."_

"_You want me to go in this operation completely alone no one but you will know I'm even in there and you just think NCIS is going to let that slide? That they won't come looking for me for an explanation why I'm all of a sudden gone?"_

"_No you will give them an explanation. You will be handing in your resignation giving them the reason that you can't do the work anymore. That all of this pressure has been too much for you so you're going to leave for a while and get out of town. I'm sure Hetty over there will be calling me and I will tell them the same thing that you took time off here as well."_

"_You think they will just up and believe that? Not only that I'm supposed to backstop this alias Jose will look into my background it needs to be flawless. Eric is the best tech he's my only shot and having a perfect background that will hold up to their digging. You want this cartel I get that but NCIS can help you get them I can talk to them tomorrow and explain what's going on. It's not their area but I know they won't say no to something this huge and dangerous. Don't let this be personal Lue let them help."_

"_This is personal thirty-six dead cops on my precinct doorstep is very much personal detective. This stays with LAPD no one else knows about this but LAPD. I am the only one that knows the location of these cartels all of their information that we have managed to get on them is in that package in your mailbox. Once you read it you will burn it and leave no trace what so ever. Either you are a detective or you are nothing so decide what it will be."_

"_This is a suicide operation you know that."_

"_You've dealt with cartels before and you've survived you are one of the best undercover detectives that I have. That doesn't mean there are not a hundred more men that stand behind you ready to take your place. You are not irreplaceable detective so don't make that mistake in thinking you are. You and I both know you'll do this because you're a cop first. If I don't hear from Hetty tomorrow then I'll know you refused to go. Which then I will make sure you have nothing left do not cross me detective."_

They all stood there silently watching and listening to the conversation that went on between Deeks and his Lieutenant. The whole conversation you could see the turmoil all over Deeks face it was clear he didn't want to go on this operation. His rage was made clear when he threw the mug across the room they then saw him going upstairs after a few moments and they knew what happened then. He went up to use Eric's computer to start backstopping a new alias. Sam was the first one to break the silence between them.

"It's a suicide mission."

"Why would Deeks do this?" Kensi asked she just couldn't believe this was happening.

"He didn't have a choice his Lieutenant is furious at the situation and is making it personal. Sending Deeks in or anyone else shouldn't be happening not after that many deaths." Callen said

"His Lieutenant is definitely taking this personal and that is the quickest way to getting someone killed. This explains everything though that's why I received this letter and why he made his alias up here and not on his own computer." Hetty said

"What do you mean?" Kensi asked

"My computer is the only one that logs and records everything that gets done on it. By Deeks using my computer he knew that when I came in I would see that someone was on it. Deeks' knew I would find these records." Eric explained

"He was counting on it he said it himself that you're the best he knew that in order to at least survive longer his records had to be flawless. Something that Deeks doesn't have the experience in doing so. He was counting on you finding those records along with that letter." Callen said

" can you go into those records and finish them so they will live up to scrutiny?"

"Ya I can do that I won't add any information I'll just use what he has but I can make then official."

"Good do that right away that is your priority right now. We need to give him as much of a chance as we can. The cartel clearly has someone on the inside in LAPD so we can't call them for any information. As for his Lieutenant I will deal with him later for now we know nothing about this. Ms. Jones look into Deeks' file and tell me how many times he has been undercover for a cartel please."

"What are you thinking Hetty?" Sam asked

"Well Mr. Deeks has been undercover before with a cartel one that I know of. Now one cartel there isn't any reason for concern but more than one and then we may have a very serious situation." Hetty explained

"Cartels little fishes bounce around from one to the other especially when one of the head guys is taken down. So if he's only been undercover with one cartel then the chances of someone recognizing him is slim more than one that possibility goes up." Callen said understanding what Hetty was getting at.

"Exactly Mr. Callen."

"Um then we have a serious problem. Each undercover detective has a list of places they can't do undercover work. Deeks only has one position he can't work undercover for and that's cartels. It was put in place after his seventh cartel he brought down." Nell said

"It just got worse." Sam said clearly getting more and more angry that this was going on. Deeks was annoying at a lot of times but he was a good guy through and through he didn't deserve anything less than loyalty and that's exactly what he gave him.

"Why would his own Lieutenant put him in this position? Deeks is clearly the worst detective to put in this operation. The chances that someone will recognize him just went from slim to eighty percent. Seven cartels that's insane he shouldn't have been involved in half of them. I knew that Deeks wasn't very well liked over there from the dirty cops he's put away but to jeopardize his life intentionally by putting him in now eight different cartels it's the same thing as just shooting him in the head." Callen said.

"Hetty we have to get him out of there. We can't just leave him on his own. His lieutenant isn't going to get him out if he's in trouble you know that." Kensi said

"I completely agree Ms. Blye. Mr. Deeks is one of our own and I do not take it lightly when one of mine gets threatened in any way. I want you three to go over to Mr. Deeks' place and see if you can find anything that he might have left behind. Mr. Beale and Ms. Jones I want all the information you can get on this cartel The Little Devils, I want the autopsy reports of all the dead police officers, I want to know everything how long they lived for what happened to them. Also see if you can find anything out about this cell phone his Lieutenant provided for him we need a number to contact Mr. Deeks. This is a priority we need to get him out of there find him."

"What about his lieutenant?" Kensi asked

"I will deal with him after we have Mr. Deeks back. No one threatens one of mine and gets away with it. After this operation I do believe it is time to sit down with Mr. Deeks and convince him to sign those papers to become an agent. His loyalty to LAPD is impressive and honorable but to have such a strong loyalty to people that see him as expendable is wrong. Mr. Deeks is anything but expendable the work he has done and accomplished in his life is proof of that. So we find him go look around his apartment you three when you are done come back here and we will go over what we have."

With that Hetty left to go and make some phone calls herself. She had never heard of this cartel before but judging by how the bodies were found she couldn't only imagine that they were one of the worst. She would work her own connections to see what information she could get on them. Sam, Callen and Kensi left the ops center to head over to Deeks' apartment. They didn't really expect to find much but they had to try they were all hoping that Eric and Nell pulled through for them and found what they needed to get Deeks back today before he got too far that they couldn't track him. Deeks was good at what he does none of them would ever deny that if he didn't want to be found he wouldn't be found just like the rest of them. He didn't have training for what an agent usually has but years with being an undercover detective did give him all the skills that they all had.

They took Sam's charger and they drove over to Deeks' apartment each one was lost in their own thoughts they didn't speak to each other. Kensi was caught between being furious and worried. She knew Deeks wouldn't have done this unless he had no choice and given the phone conversation he had with his Lieutenant it was clear to all of them that he really didn't have a choice. She was furious at Deeks but that was only because she didn't want to feel the worry and fear that was spreading through her body. It was always easier for her to be mad then to be scared even if it was for someone else. She had already experienced the pain of losing a partner she didn't want to have to go through that all over again. Dom was a good guy and it took a while but she did get over the pain of him being gone. Deeks was different though he was opposite of Dom and Kensi knew that it would take her a long time to get over his death if she ever did get over it. There really was only one Deeks out there in the world and she knew her world would become a lot darker with him gone from it.

Callen was doing his best to focus on the task at hand rather than the fact that Deeks might not come back to them. Deeks was different from them in the group and Callen had to admit he wasn't too thrilled when he was told that Deeks would be a part of the team as a Liaison. He understood the point Hetty was making and it did make it easier to work with LAPD on cases or when a case came up but why she would have chosen Deeks he couldn't understand. He was different from the other personalities in the group and he definitely didn't think him and Kensi being partners was never going to last. They were complete opposites yet here they were a year later and Deeks had become one of their own. They would die to protect Deeks just like he would for any of them they had all become a family. Now they had to fight to find one of their members before it was too late.

Sam was furious and he wasn't even trying to hide it. What just happened to Deeks went against his very soul and SEAL code that runs through him. Deeks was loyal and had a rare moral compass. He was a good man and for Sam that was speaking a lot. Deeks was annoying sure but he had proved himself multiple times that he belonged on the team and in the family. He had protected Kensi on more than one occasion and he even protected Callen and himself at one point. Deeks was younger than Callen and himself and whether it was the SEAL in his blood or something else he saw Deeks as a younger brother. Now he's younger brother was out there and in danger and he isn't there to protect him. Sam was sure he would rip his Lieutenant's head off when he saw him again. If SEALS were anything they were loyal and clearly Deeks' Lieutenant wasn't loyal to his own men.

They pulled up to Deeks' apartment and the first thing they noticed was that Deeks' car was still here. They foolishly hoped that he hadn't left yet but they all knew it was false hope he would have left last night. Callen pulled out his phone to call Eric to see if he could track Deeks and see what car he got into.

"Hey Callen."

"Hey Eric Deeks' car is still here can you try and pull up some camera footage and see where he went to."

"I'm on it."

"Thanks"

Callen hung up and followed Sam and Kensi into the apartment. The first thing they noticed was Monty coming up to them when they walked in. Kensi bent down to pet the dog that Deeks loved very much.

"Hey Monty I guess you're going to be coming with me for a little bit."

Kensi stood up and she made her way around the living room with Monty following her the whole way. Callen then turned to the dog.

"Monty where's Deeks?"

Callen asked the dog but he knew he wasn't going to answer it was a dog after all. So he was surprised when Monty left the room and came back a few moments later with something in his mouth. He walked up to Callen and sat in front of him. Callen bent down and held his hand out for Monty to drop whatever was in his mouth which the dog did. Callen stood back up and opened the black wallet.

"It's his badge."

"Monty must have gotten it off the dining room table." Kensi said as she walked towards the dining room.

Kensi walked back into the living room where Callen and Sam were looking around in her hand was Deeks' cell phone and watch.

"Well it's safe to say he's gone undercover." Sam said

"Ok there's got to be something in here that we can go off of. Deeks gave us his alias maybe he left something else here to give us an idea of the location." Callen said

They spread out searching different rooms of the house Kensi took the bedroom, Sam the kitchen and Callen was in the living room. They looked through everything they could to try and find something that might give them a clue as to where Deeks went. After a good hour they had nothing.

"There's a few of his clothes missing and a bag but that's it in the bedroom." Kensi said

"There's some ashes in the sink my guess is it's from the papers he was ordered to burn up. There's nothing left but ashes we can't get anything from them." Sam explained

"I got nothing either I have a feeling all we're going to get is just his alias and that's only because he wanted us to have it." Callen said

"Alright let's go back to Ops maybe they got more lucky then us." Sam said

"Come on Monty let's go for a car ride." Kensi said

Monty stood up and Kensi put a leash on him and they went back to Sam's car. The drive to OPS was once again done in silence. Each trying to go over what could happen to Deeks with him being completely alone in this op. Kensi looked over at Monty who had his head out the window. Deeks leaving Monty there just spoke volumes in his trust with Kensi and the team. He knew they wouldn't believe that he just resigned out of nowhere. He knew that Kensi would go over to his place and find Monty. Kensi knew how much Deeks loves Monty so it really was a no brainer to take him back to her place until they got Deeks back and the dog really was a sweet dog. They got back to Ops and they got out and went up to find Eric, Nell and Hetty back in the ops center. Hetty turned to her agents as they entered she immediately noticed the old looking hair ball following behind Kensi.

"I sent you all to find Mr. Deeks and you come back with an old raggedy looking dog. Care to explain?"

"This is Monty he's an old police dog and he's Deeks. We found him at Deeks' apartment and obviously we can't just leave him there." Kensi explained

"Very true Ms. Blye. Did you find anything?"

"No just his wallet, badge and watch. There were some ashes in his kitchen sink but nothing we could use." Callen said

"Did you guys find anything?" Sam asked

"I was able to find a camera by Deeks' apartment and I was able to get the footage. Deeks was in his apartment for roughly an hour before he left and went around the block. He went into a parking lot that's just around the corner from his place and got into a black mustang. Now I couldn't get the license plate the car has some kind of reflection plate over them so you can't read the plate. I can tell you he drove off in the direction of the highway before I lost him."

"So we know what he's driving but we can't track him down. We also don't have the license plate which means we can't see who the car is registered to." Kensi said

"Which could be an issue if one of the cartels run the plates and it doesn't come back as his alias." Callen said

"This whole cover op is getting worse and worse by the hour." Sam said

"I'm afraid it's going to get worse for Mr. Deeks. Mr. Beale if you would please pull up the information you managed to get."

Eric turned to his key board and began to pull up the medical files of each officer's autopsy reports and their police files for the operation. He put them up on the big screen so they can see.

"What are we looking at Eric?" Callen asked

"These are the autopsy reports of each officer. Now he's the short version; each one was tortured as well as sexually assaulted. The first officer only lasted a week from the time the operation started till he turned up dead on the precinct's doorstep. Now with each officer the time they were gone for got longer slowly the last officer that just died a few days ago lasted three months. Now every single one also had heroin in their systems as well as ligature marks on their wrist and ankles."

"So they were all restrained, drugged and tortured in every sense of the word." Sam said

"Here's the main issue all the torture and heroin started the second day of the operation and it lasted until they were dead." Nell said

"So their evolving in their torture. They are learning what to do so it prolongs their pain to the point where they can last till three months." Callen said

"We gotta find him. Deeks doesn't know this does he?" Kensi asked

"No I would suspect that he doesn't. His lieutenant never mentioned it on the phone call and I can't imagine it was in those papers either. Otherwise Mr. Deeks would never have gone regardless of the threats that his lieutenant gave. We have not been able to locate him yet he left last night around one in the morning. I was able to get some information on the cartel from one of my contacts. The Little Devil's operate out of San Diego so they are in California which is good. However, no one knows all of their locations of their hide outs or where exactly in San Diego. They have managed to stay hidden from all police tasks as well as other organizations. There isn't a lot of information on them but what there is isn't anything good. They are the number one cartel in the United States, they are as you can see incredibly violent. No one has ever gotten out alive and the men that work for the cartel don't go against the leader who is one Jose Martinez. He has no previous record from what my contact told me his father was in charge of the cartel and taught him everything he knows. When his father died Jose took over when he was twenty, he is now forty."

"So he's dangerous and we have no information on him other than his age. This is great what the hell do we do we can't stake out all of San Diego." Kensi said clearly getting more and more frustrated with this situation.

"San Diego is about one hundred miles from here Mr. Deeks would have been there within an hour my guess is he got a motel for the night and has a plan on how to get into the cartel. If he is able to get into the cartel we have somewhere between twenty-four and forty- eight hours before the torture begins. This is all assuming that Mr. Deeks can even get into the cartel."

"No Deeks will get in he's done it already seven previous times he knows how to get in. what he doesn't know is what will happen to him once he is in."

"We need to find him and quick Dees can handle torture and I'm sure he's done drugs before undercover. The sexual assault I don't think that's something he would be able to handle. He's use to pain but that's something completely different I don't think his mind could handle that." Kensi said

"We will find him Kensi Deeks will hang on. You just have to have faith in him Deeks is the best in undercover you know that." Sam said trying his best to reassure her. Even though he himself was seriously worried now himself. Deeks was in serious trouble and Kensi was right his mind wouldn't be able to handle being raped no man can.

"What about the phone?" Callen asked

"Haven't been able to find it my best guess is that it's a burn phone that his lieutenant bought but where I don't know." Eric said

"So now what we have nothing no way of finding him." Kensi said

They all stood there just looking at each other no one knowing what to say. The reality was they had no idea where he was, where he was going and even worse how to find him. They had nothing but an alias and until that alias came up somewhere they had nothing. Not the car and not the phone even other organizations had nothing on this cartel. They all knew the answer to the question but no one wanted to say it out loud, because that would mean admitting defeat admitting failure. This was one time they really couldn't afford to fail Deeks couldn't afford them to fail. But they had nothing Deeks was good and that was exactly the problem he was too good. He could hide just as well as they could maybe even better. They all knew what the answer would be but that didn't make hearing it any easier when Hetty finally spoke.

"We wait."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Eight months, eight long horrible months. That's how long it had been since Deeks left them to go on an undercover mission. They haven't heard anything from his alias or from LAPD they have been completely left in the dark. Everyday Eric checks the police reports to see if a body was found matching Deeks description and so far nothing which could be a good thing or a bad thing. No body meant that he was still alive but it also meant they had no idea what condition he was in. if the cartel figured out he was a cop he could have been tortured these last eight months. Deeks is the best at what he does this is true but those other detectives were also good and they didn't even pass the cartel's insight. Jose Martinez is a sociopath he could have just brought them into one of his locations just for the purpose to torture them and found out later that they were police. All of the team were going crazy not knowing what was going on with Deeks. Hetty hadn't filed Deeks position she knew that she is supposed to but she couldn't bring herself to do it. If he was still alive and they did get him back that position was his, he was Kensi's partner no one else. So they just made it work between the three of them they would take turns in going solo on jobs none of them minded after all they were all still hoping that Deeks would walk back into the mission one day.

It was nearing the end of the day when Hetty got a call on her cell phone.

"Lange"

The other end was silent she was about to hang up when she heard the faint sound of breathing on the other end of the phone. So she tried again.

"Lange"

"He…Hetty"

Hetty stood up at the sound of the man's voice it was raw and weak but she knew that voice belonged to Deeks. She walked out to the bullpen as she spoke waving her other agents to join her as she went upstairs.

"Mr. Deeks stay with me."

"Deeks?" Kensi asked as the three of them got up and followed Hetty upstairs to where Eric and Nell were sitting at their computers.

"Mr. Beale trace this call right now."

"Ah sure one second."

"Mr. Deeks I'm going to put you on speaker."

Hetty clicked the cell phone so it was on speaker and the other agents in the room could hear him.

"Mr. Deeks can you tell me where you are?"

"It's cold… I… I don't know"

They couldn't believe how horrible he sounded it truly was heart breaking.

"Hey partner."

"Hey Fern"

Kensi couldn't help but let a small smile show on her face at the mention of his nickname for her. It's what he called her on their first uncover operation together.

"Do you know if you've been there the whole time?"

"Ya I think so… I've only been gone two months I think I've been here."

They all looked at each other no one saying anything. Nell had tears in her eyes at the realisation of this situation truly began to sink in. Deeks didn't even know how long he had been gone for. Callen was the one to speak this time.

"Deeks you've been gone for eight months now."

"What?"

Deeks' voice sounded completely defeated it was clear in his voice how much pain he truly was in.

"Deeks I need you to just hang on man okay. We almost have your location then we are coming to get you."

"It hurts…"

"Deeks listen to me listen to my voice we will get you out of there just hang on a little longer. We are coming for you."

"Sam…I can't…"

"Yes you can Deeks just listen to my voice hang on. Is there a window where you are?"

"Ya… I found a phone."

"Can you see out the window?"

"I can't… it hurts too much."

"Ok that's ok Deeks just try and breath are you alone?"

"For now but they'll be back"

"Got the location." Eric said

"Deeks we know where you are we are coming for you right now. Do not give up we are coming for you just hang on Deeks."

They heard other voices in the background and the sound of footsteps. Deeks' breathing became more erratic he was panicking.

"They're back… hurry please I can't take anymore."

"Deeks hang on we'll be there soon do not give up."

With that the line went dead.

"Eric where is he?"

"The location is already sent to your phones it looks like a house from what I can pick up."

"It's in San Diego." Nell added.

"I'm driving we hurry we can be there within an hour." Sam said

"I'll call local PD and let them know of the situation they can meet you there for back up. Be safe and bring him home call me when you have him I'll meet you at the hospital." Hetty said

The three of them left to get geared up once they were ready then made their way out to Sam's car and headed off for San Diego. Sam didn't waste any time once they got onto the highway he put his foot down making his car go to top speed. They needed to hurry Deeks was fading that much was clear with the simple phone call they just had. His voice was raw and weak it was clear he was in pain and from the sounds of it he was out of it. If Deeks had been drugged for the last eight months on heroin then his body would be addicted to the drug. If that was the case he had an even longer road to recovery then they had originally thought.

"We need a plan for when we get there." Callen said

"Eric said this was a house right?" Kensi asked

"Ya"

"Deeks said he found a phone now it's been eight months my guess would be that he has been kept in a room or in a basement."

"And when they all left he was able to get to a phone somewhere in the house." Callen said finishing Kensi's thought.

"If that's true that also means they will notice that he's not where he's supposed to be." Sam added

"Alright when we get there Kensi you take the back Sam and I will take the front. When we get in Sam you go down into the basement if there is one Kensi you stay on the main floor and I'll go up. Their cartels so there's going to be guns all over the place so be careful."

"We're about twenty minutes away San Diego PD should be there just after us." Sam said

The rest of the drive was done in silence each agent trying to get their own minds ready for what they were about to walk in on. They had waited for eight months to finally find Deeks and now they were on their way to get him out. None of them knew what kind of condition he would be in, but they did know he wouldn't be in good shape. If the cartel stuck to how they had been treating the undercovers in the last two years Deeks would be completely destroyed. Kensi did her best to focus on the task at hand and not her feelings towards Deeks and what could have happened to him in the last eight months. They pulled up just a few houses down from their target. They were in a residential area and they knew that this was one of their houses. There was a good chance that Jose Martinez was the owner of this house and that he was inside.

"I know this is personal to all of us but let's be smart and safe about this. It isn't going to help Deeks any if we get hurt. Let's do this." Callen said

They got out of the car and made their way over to the house Kensi immediately went around back as Callen and Sam took the front. They each knew what they were to do and they weren't going to fail Deeks he was coming home today and that was final. Local police would be there soon they knew it would have taken them a little longer for they had to get a tactical force set up so they could join in on the raid once they got Deeks out.

"Kensi you ready?" Sam asked through the com-link

"Ready"

"3,2,1 Go."

Sam kicked the front door down the same time that Kensi kicked the back door down. They all entered the house with their guns raised calling out NCIS. Sure enough there were men in the house with guns already up and ready to fire. Sam saw a door that he was sure lead to a basement he didn't waste a second he opened the door and ran down the stairs. Callen and Kensi took care of the ones on that floor there were five different shooters and they took them all down before they headed upstairs to check the rest of the house out. Callen went up the stairs first with Kensi behind him they went up slow they weren't sure if all the men were in the main level of the house or not. Sure enough upstairs there were another four men there waiting for the right time to ambush them. They took them down easily enough just like the others that were in the main level of the house.

Sam went down the stairs as quietly as possible if someone was down there he didn't want them to get a head start on him. He could hear voices and other sounds coming from the left hand side of the stairs.

"Mmm even after all this time he's still as tight as ever." One male voice said.

Sam could also hear another man and what sounded like a whipping sound. Sam came around the corner his gun drawn and ready to fire. He couldn't believe what he saw. There was one man whipping Deeks while the other was raping him. Deeks was unconscious and his hands were bound behind his back he was also naked and covered in bruises and blood. Sam didn't even say anything he just pointed his gun to the man that was raping his unconscious friend and fired hitting him in the head killing him he then did the same thing to the other man as he turned around to the sound of the gunshot. Once both men were down Sam ran over to Deeks kicking the man that was raping him away from Deeks. Sam looked around the room to find something that he could use to cover Deeks up but he didn't see anything so he spoke on the com-link.

"G you all clear?"

"Ya we're good you?"

"Ya go out to the car in the trunk there's my bag in there grab a pair of sweats from it and bring it downstairs."

"On it."

"Sam I'm coming down."

"No Kensi stay up there that's an order."

"Sam he's my partner."

"And he wouldn't want you to see him like this stay up there Kensi I mean it."

"Fine"

Sam put his gun away and bent down to check Deeks out. He pulled out a pocket knife and cut the bounds on his wrists. Sam couldn't help but notice the blood that was running down Deeks legs from being raped. Sam looked over Deeks he was covered in blood some fresh from the lashings he just took. His breathing was shallow and he noticed a used needle not too far from them. He was sure that they had drugged him before they bound and raped him. Sam heard the door to the basement open and the sound of Callen's voice

"Sam I'm coming down."

Sam didn't say anything and Callen took that as the ok to come down. He made his way down the stairs holding the pair of sweatpants in his hand. He wasn't prepared for what he saw.

"Oh Deeks"

"Ya its bad help me get the pants on him G."

"Ya"

Carefully they rolled Deeks over so he was on his back and they slowly got the sweatpants on the too thin detective. The whole time Deeks didn't even move which worried both agents more than they wanted to admit.

"We gotta get him out of here and to a hospital." Callen said

Sam bent down and gently shook Deeks.

"Deeks come on man wake up."

Deeks made a small sound it wasn't much but it made the agents feel better. Slowly Sam grabbed Deeks' arms being careful not to hurt anymore of his injuries he got him up on his feet so they could get out of here. Deeks started to come to once he was standing his mind was all blurry and he was dizzy. Sam felt Deeks sway on his feet and he put an arm around his waist to hold him up.

"Stay with me Deeks."

"Sam"

"I got you Deeks you're safe now."

Deeks brought his shaky hands to hold on to Sam to steady himself on his feet Sam held onto him making sure that Deeks was able to stand. Sam could feel his whole body shaking he figured it was a combination of pain and the coldness in the room.

"Cold"

"I know we're going to get you out of here come on we'll take it slow."

Deeks just gave a nod he was having a hard time staying awake and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold on for much longer. Callen came beside them to help Sam get Deeks over to the stairs just walking that short distances Deeks' breathing had gotten heavy. The problem was how they were going to get him up a flight of stairs. Slowly Sam was able to get Deeks up the flight of stairs one step at a time. With each step Sam could feel Deeks' pain level rising it was obvious to both Sam and Callen that Deeks was fighting as best as he could to not pass out on them. Callen made sure he walked behind them as they went up the stairs just in case Deeks slipped and he needed to catch him. Finally out of the basement Kensi was standing there waiting for them to come out she couldn't believe what she saw when they walked through that basement door.

"Deeks"

Kensi walked over to Sam who was holding up a barely conscious Deeks in his arms. Deeks was pale and trembling in Sam's arms. He was covered in bruises and blood. He was extremely thin all of his muscles were gone and she could see his ribs. His hair was dirty and a mess and he had a thick beard from eight months of not shaving.

"We gotta get him into the car and back to LA" Callen said

"Local PD are here I gave them a report and told them to call if they needed anything else."

"Good let's move before he's completely passed out." Sam said

Slowly they were able to get Deeks out to Sam's car and with the help of Callen they were able to get him to the back seat and lying down. Kensi got in and sat on the edge of the seat looking at her partner.

"Sam do you have a blanket or something to cover him up with his body is freezing." Kensi asked as she put her hand on her partner's body for the first time in eight months.

"Ya I got a blanket in the trunk."

Sam said as he made his way to the trunk and grabbed the blanket that he always had in case of an emergency. He handed it back over to Kensi and she placed it over Deeks who was completely passed out now. Sam and Callen got into the car and took off for the highway once again. Callen got on the phone and called Hetty to let her know they were on their way.

"Lange"

"Hetty we got him we're on our way back."

"How is he Mr. Callen?"

"He's bad really bad. We'll meet you at the hospital the doctor will be able to tell us more but from what I can tell he's got some serious injuries and broken bones."

"Do you think he's been tortured this whole time?"

"Ya I think he was. He's passed out right now in the back seat we should be at the hospital in about half an hour."

"I'll meet you there."

Callen hung up the phone then turned his attention to Kensi.

"How is he?"

"His breathing is pretty shallow there's needle markings on the inside of both arms I think he's high right now. From what I can tell his right wrist seems to be broken, he has some broken ribs that I can tell. There's a lot of bruising all over him it's hard to tell what is broken and what is just bruised. He's thin though really thin they've definitely been starving him and I'm pretty sure he's dehydrated."

"Ok as long as he keeps breathing that's the main thing."

"He looks so sick from the drugs he's so thin he looks just like a drug addict."

"He's not a drug addict Kensi they drugged him probably for the last eight months. He was forced into this operation and the last eight months he's been forced to drugs this isn't his fault."

"We will get him through this Kensi we got him out of there that's what counts. We'll be at the hospital soon enough and the doctors will take care of him." Sam said

The remainder of the drive was done in silence each agent sat there and listened to the weak wheezing sound of Deeks breathing. Each minute that went by it was clear that he was having a harder time breathing that passed. Finally they arrived at the hospital Sam pulled up to the ER entrance and then got out so he could grab Deeks. Again with the help of Callen they were able to get Deeks out of the back seat of the car the problem was he was still unconscious so Callen had to help Sam hold up Deeks and walk into the hospital. Kensi yelled for help and a doctor as they entered the building once the nurses saw the condition Deeks was in they hurried over to them with a stretcher and called for a doctor. Within a few minutes Deeks was gone and they were told to wait in the waiting room till a doctor came for them.

Hetty came in a few moments later to find all three of her agents sitting in the waiting room. She could see the blood on Sam's shirt and on his hands.

"Mr. Hannah why don't you go and change your shirt and wash up."

Sam looked down he didn't even realise he was covered in Deeks' blood. He just gave a nod and left the room to get a clean shirt and wash up.

"Do we know anything?"

"Not yet they took him away a few minutes ago. I'm surprised we beat you here." Kensi said

"I had a few phone calls I needed to make."

"Did you hear from the San Diego police department?" Callen asked

"I did call them to ask if they have ID anyone they haven't yet but they sent pictures of the men and Mr. Beale is working on it now. I haven't called LAPD yet I will once we know what Mr. Deeks condition is and if he even wants me to call them."

"What if he doesn't want you to call them?" Kensi asked

"It is an LAPD case, however, they left Mr. Deeks there to fight for himself and he has been seriously injured. If he wishes for me not to speak with LAPD then I will respect that as far as I'm concerned the second his Lieutenant threatened him this became our case. I will see what Mr. Deeks condition is and decide from there."

Hetty sat down with the rest of them and waited for the doctor to come out and report to them on how Deeks was doing. It was three hours before a doctor finally emerged from the room that was holding Deeks.

"Family of Martin Deeks?"

"Yes that is us." Hetty said as the four of them stood up.

The doctor looked from one agent to the next doubt clearly showing on his face.

"Mr. Deeks is an agent of mine I am his next of kin. We are his family the only one he has."

"Alright my name is Dr. Robert Thompson Martin is my patient. I would like to start off by saying he is going to live and make a full recovery in time. That's the good news. The bad news is his body is extremely damaged the level of exhaustion alone is enough to kill him. You said he was one of your agents how long has he been gone?"

"Eight months now." Hetty answered

"I'm not going to ask you what he was doing but I can tell you that he has been brutally tortured for all of those eight months. I'll start from the top and work my way down. He has a server concussion that will heal in a few days but he will have some bad headaches for a few weeks possibly months. His throat and mouth have bruising his throat is raw from server strangulation which has damaged his vocal cords so it will hurt for a good three weeks talking. This voice will also be low almost like a whisper until his vocal cords start to heal. His torso is covered with bruises, cuts, he has three broken ribs and five bruised ribs. His right wrist is badly sprained it's in a brace right now. His back is covered in bruises and whip markings. His total body has approximately one hundred and twenty stitches in various places. His legs hold more bruising and cuts as well. He has been starved my best guess would be he ate once every three weeks just enough to keep him from dying. He is also dehydrated again was given water once every three days. Are there any questions so far?"

"How long will all his injuries take till he is completely healed?" Callen asks

"Assuming everything heals nicely and there are no complications like infection his injuries should be healed in three months. Now I'm assuming he was not on drugs before he was away am I correct?"

"That's correct." Hetty answered

"He's been given heroin for the past eight months it's been injected into him at high levels three, four times a day every single day. His body has built it up and even though he isn't using anymore his body is still functioning like he is. This is simply from the amount that has been in his system for the past eight months. He won't really be feeling any withdrawals for three days roughly my guess would be. Once the withdrawals hit he will feel horrible. He'll have a fever, get the shakes, vomiting, dizziness, irritability, cold sweats, muscle cramps and mood swings. He'll say something in the moment he won't mean it but it's just the withdrawals he can't really help it. The withdrawals will typically last two weeks it varies though depending on how long the dependency has been for. Because of the drugs, starvation and dehydration it has taken its toll on his muscles. His body is weak right now and it will take a while for his endurance to go back up to where it originally was. You'll notice that he gets tired more quickly from doing simple tasks like walking etc. best thing to do is to start off slow and then gradually build up to strengthen his muscles as well as a healthy diet. Now there is one final issue for the past eight months he has been brutally raped by more than one man. From what I can tell he was gang raped at least three times a week for the past eight months. There was extensive damaged done internally that will heal. What worries me the most will be his mental and emotional state when he wakes up."

The doctor took a few seconds to let all the information sink into the agents mind. It was a lot to take in and they needed some time to fully process the information that was given. The doctor knew that the physical injuries are always the easiest to overcome it was the mental and emotional ones that always concerned him.

"I can't believe this is happening." Kensi whispered.

"I know this is a lot to take in my main concerns are those wounds that are mental and emotional. This isn't my area of expertise; however, I can tell you that when he is fully awake and the drugs are getting out of his system all of this will hit him and he will be getting flashbacks. Right now there is probably a lot he doesn't remember and that's from the drugs in his system but once the withdrawals hit those memories will start to come back. I can prescribe medications that will help him along in this process but he needs to see someone preferably a therapist that understands a little of what he went through. I'm assuming he went undercover so if you know of a therapist that has experience in that area then that will help him feel more comfortable."

"I've already taken care of that doctor." Hetty said

"Good the sooner he gets into see someone the sooner he can really start to heal. His stay at the hospital really won't be that long simply because there really isn't much we can do. His injuries are fairly minor a lot of them but minor. I'd like to keep him for three days to hydrate him and keep an eye on his concussion but after that as long as no complications come up he can go home. Which I think will be good for him to be back around his processions and with the withdrawals I'm sure he would be more comfortable at home."

"Ok can we see him?" Hetty asked

"You can he's asleep right now we do have an oxygen mask on him to help him breathe a little easier until we can get him hydrated. Try not to wake him his body is completely exhausted he needs all the sleep he can get."

"We will we just would feel better seeing him." Callen said

"I completely understand he's in room 213 if you have any further questions or concerns feel free to have one of the nurses page me."

"Thank you Dr. Thompson." Hetty said

With that being said they went off to Deeks' room to check and see how he was doing with their own eyes. Everything the doctor had told them they were all trying to process the seriousness of what Deeks went through and what he will continue to go through. He had a long road ahead of him to heal from all of this and each one made a silent vow to help him in any way they can along the way. They refused to fail him again. They walked into the room and they couldn't help but feel horrible at the sight that greeted them. Deeks was lying down on the hospital bed that was slightly raised in the back to help him breathing. He had an oxygen mask on to help his breathing. He had an IV in his right hand and his torso was covered in patches of bandages from the stitches. What wasn't covered by bandages were covered by cuts and bruising. Kensi went and sat down in the chair next to his bed on his left. Callen and Sam moved over to stand by his right and Hetty remained standing at the end of his bed. No one spoke for a few minutes each one trying to figure out what to do from here.

"Mr. Callen and Mr. Hannah I think it's time we had a word with Lieutenant Bates. Why don't you two go and pick him up and meet me in the boatshed."

"I thought you were going to wait to see what Deeks said about it?" Kensi asked

"Mr. Deeks condition cannot be ignored when he does wake up I will speak with him and try and find out what happened. For now though Lt. Bates needs to be handled what he did is unacceptable."

"I'll be more than happy to go and get this bastard." Sam said

"Just bring him to the boatshed I'll be there waiting for you. Hopefully Eric will have more information on the men that were killed today as well. Until we have confirmation that Jose Martinez is dead Ms. Blye stay here with Mr. Deeks and keep a close eye on him. Until otherwise you are on security detail."

"I don't plan on leaving his side again. Could you do me a favor though before you go could you ask a nurse to bring in some shaving stuff please?"

"Sure I'll go ask." Callen said

"I know it's not much but I might help make him feel more normal ya know?"

"I'm sure he would appreciate it Ms. Blye."

"We'll keep you updated and let ya know what we find." Sam said

"Ya I'll do the same."

With that the three of them left and Kensi couldn't help but let a small tear slide down her cheek. Now it was just her and Deeks and there was nothing there to keep her from breaking down. She knew she couldn't though for whatever pain she was in she knew her partner was in unbearable pain on so many different levels. He needed her to be strong for him he needed her and she would be exactly what he needed. A few minutes later a nurse came in with a razor, shaving cream and a bowl with warm water. Kensi thanked the nurse as she placed the contents on the bedside table and then left the room. Kensi picked up the shaving cream and carefully placed some on his face. She then wiped her hand on a cloth that was on the table. She picked up the razor and carefully began to shave eight months worth of hair off Deeks' face. She was careful to remove the oxygen mask when she got to the part around his mouth once she was done she placed it back. Deeks didn't even stir the whole time though the doctor did say his body was completely exhausted and she was sure the drugs had something to do with it. Once he was completely shaven she sat back down in her chair and felt better that she could now see his face. Though with his face shaven she could see more bruising on his face that his beard had originally hid. For the first time in eight months she found herself wondering what had happened to make this operation go so horribly wrong from the start.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

**Eight Months Earlier**

It was well after two in the morning when Deeks came across some run down shady motel on the side of the road just on the outskirts of San Diego. Deeks would be lying if he said he wasn't tired he was exhausted so he pulled in a parking spot and got out. He needed a place to stay while he was undercover and this would work for now later on if everything was going well he would find a different place. He got out and went over to the office and paid for a week for now and then went back to his car to get his bag. He was in room 203 so he was on the top floor so he went up the stairs outside and across the balcony till he reached his room. He opened the door and stepped inside the room which he was thankful for the air conditioner in the window. It was a hot night just like it usually is in California so after putting his bag down he immediately went to turn it on. After that he took a moment to look over the room it wasn't huge but it wasn't small either. There was a desk in the corner, a dresser with a nice TV on top of it, there was a queen size bed and a few end tables. The bathroom was nice with a tub, which Deeks had come to appreciate over the years of undercover work he had gotten beat up on more than one occasion as initiation into that organization. Deeks had to admit he was surprised at how nice and clean the room was considering the outside looked like shit. He decided to put his clothes away in the dresser before changing into sweatpants and climbing into bed shirtless.

He was exhausted and his mind needed the rest so he could figure out how to get into the cartel. He knew where they would be tomorrow night or technically tonight so he had all day to come up with a plan on how to stand out. For now though he needed rest so he was ready for whatever was going to be coming his way. Though nothing could have prepared him for what happened that night. He had spent a good eight hours sleeping then after a shower he went into town to get something to eat. He had a plan for tonight and all he could do was hope that it worked. He had experience with cartels before he knew what it took to get noticed and to get them to take him into the organization. It always involves fighting one of their body guards which he had to win or it would be game over. So when he went into their bar that night he immediately noticed Jose's body guard and after a good fight Jose had invited him to join him at his table.

With Jose he had a few of his men with him which Deeks knew that someone like Jose couldn't afford to be out in public alone even with his body guards. Deeks had introduced himself making sure he was arrogant and confident he had to let Jose see that he was an alpha male and wouldn't take shit from people, but he also had to let him know that he could follow orders. Jose had asked where he learned how to fight like that and Deeks gave him the same story he always gave cartels that he was a body guard for a previous cartel for a while. When asked what he was doing for a living Deeks always replies that he is new to town and hasn't found anything yet that with his record normal jobs weren't an option. Everything seemed to be going along just fine Jose had even invited him back to his place for a party, it was Friday after all. Deeks agreed to go knowing better than to refuse the offer so he got into his car and followed Jose and his men back to Jose's house. Deeks found himself sitting in the living room drinking a beer while they were all drinking and doing drugs the next thing Deeks knew his world was turned upside down. That was the first night of his new found hell for the next eight months.

**Present**

Callen and Sam sat in the boatshed watching to video screen to the interrogation room. They had went over to the police station to pick up Lieutenant Bates which was interesting to say the least. Local PD don't really take well to two Federal Agents just walking in like they own the place to bring their Lieutenant down for questioning. Both Callen and Sam were sure that what they did would make Deeks' Liaising more difficult for a while if that was even possible they really didn't like him very much. Though after hearing how many dirty cops that Deeks was responsible for putting away it made sense. Deeks was one of the best at undercover work especially deep cover as much as LAPD hated him they couldn't deny him of that. Hetty had walked in a few minutes later and was now sitting in the interrogation room looking at the Lieutenant.

Hetty was a frightening women and that was always made very clear when one of her agents were threatened or hurt. Callen and Sam just sat back and watched as Hetty tore apart the Lieutenant.

"So Mr. Bates care to explain to me why you sent Mr. Deeks on a deep undercover operation alone for eight months?"

"First of all its Lieutenant Ms. Lange and second of all what I do with my officers is none of your business."

"It becomes my business when it involves one of mine."

"Detective Deeks is not one of yours he is one of mine and where I send him is my choice."

"He is one of mine he became one of mine when he started working here. It is my job to protect my agents and even though Mr. Deeks doesn't have the title he is very much every bit of one of my agents. Now I already know you sent him alone undercover to The Little Devil's cartel it has been eight months and we haven't heard from him until today. Now explain to me why you would send him in to another cartel when his file clearly states he can't do cartels anymore."

"Where I send him is my business and it seems like I need to have a chat with Detective Deeks about protocol and following orders. I gave him strict orders that he was not to contact or release any information to you people."

"He didn't release any information when I got his resignation letter that morning I did some digging and found the phone conversation you had with him. That is how I know what he has been doing. He called me this morning for the first time in eight months and thank god that he did. The question is why didn't he contact you?"

"I haven't heard from him in almost six months."

"What did he say when he called?"

"Not important."

"How many times did he call?"

"He called a week in then a month then the last time was two months in haven't heard from him since. What did he tell you?"

"He needed help and that's exactly what I gave him from now on this is our investigation it would be wise for you to go nowhere near Mr. Deeks."

"Where is he?"

"He's in the hospital and until I speak with him you are to stay away from him."

"This is my investigation you don't have the authority to take it away from LAPD."

"Yes I do have the authority it became my investigation when you left him there for six months without contact. I will speak to Mr. Deeks and I will find out the whole truth to those three phone calls that he made to you. The doctor says he's been tortured for the past eight months which means those three phone calls he made he was telling you to get him out and you ignored him. Which is exactly why when he could get to a phone he called me instead of you. You willing put him in harm's way and left him there so yes this is my investigation and after I speak to him and if he does in fact confirm my suspicions then I will be taking action about it. You are to stay away from him and the hospital for now you are free to leave."

"You don't scare me Ms. Lange."

With that Lieutenant Bates stood up and made his way outside so he could go back to the station. Hetty let out a breath and headed out to join her two agents. Neither of them looked too pleased by what they just heard from the Lieutenant.

"What needs to happen next is finding out who those men were that you all shot. We need to know if Mr. Deeks is safe or not. I can't imagine Jose Martinez is the type of man that will just let him go. So we will go back to Ops and see what Eric has for us and when Mr. Deeks is awke Ms. Blye will call and we can go see him and get the story from him."

"Do you really think he left Deeks there knowing he needed to get out?" Callen asked

"I wouldn't put it past him he forced Deeks into this operation he probably wouldn't have risked more lives to get him out or to ruin the chance of getting information on Martinez." Sam said

"We won't know until we speak with Mr. Deeks. For now though we can make sure that he is safe and that's exactly what we are going to do." Hetty said

The three of them went over to the mission and went to the ops center to see what Eric had for them. They were still trying to ID everyone but they were able to ID a few of the men in the house as Jose's men. They spent the next eight hours trying to ID everyone and figure out what happened in that house. Callen and Sam were trying to help Eric and Nell but they were pretty sure they were just annoying them. They wanted to go and see Deeks but they knew they needed to stay here in case something happened. Finally Eric had all the players ID and Jose Martinez was not one of them they now had a case they were going to find Jose Martinez no matter what he was not going to get away with what he did to Deeks. Callen picked up his cell phone to call Kensi who they haven't heard from in eight hours either.

"Kensi"

"Kensi it's Callen listen Jose Martinez was not there today he's still alive."

"Ok I think you guys need to get over here."

"What's wrong?"

"It's Deeks he's been awake for an hour now I was going to call but I've been trying to calm him down. He's completely freaked out and disorientated he keeps trying to get up to leave. He just keeps saying he wants to go home. I can't calm him down and they can't give him anything because of the heroin in his system."

"Alright just keep talking to him the doctor said that he had a lot of heroin in his system so he may just be high right now. Sam and I are on our way just keep him there Kensi."

"Ya hurry please."

"We will."

Callen hung up his phone then looked at Sam who was looking back at him with a concerned look.

"We gotta get to the hospital Deeks is completely losing it. Kensi said the doctors can't give him anything because of the heroin and he just keeps saying he wants to go home."

"He probably doesn't even realise where he is if he's still high on the heroin."

"She can't get him under control she needs our help."

"Let's go."

**Seven Hours Earlier at the Hospital**

Kensi had been sitting beside Deeks' bed for nearly seven hours now she hasn't left him. Every couple of hours a nurse would come by and bring her a cup of coffee. Each time the nurse would assure her that her partner was doing ok that his body was just exhausted and needed some sleep. They did mention that he would be sleeping a lot more than usual for him for the next few weeks so his body could catch up. She couldn't help the smile that came over her when she heard him start to move around. She could see him waking up so she stood up so she was closer to the bed.

"Deeks"

Deeks let out groan as he started to wake up. He kept his eyes closed but the first thing he noticed was that he was laying on something soft and not the hard cold ground. He could feel the pain going through his body and everything hurt regardless of the drugs that he could still feel burning in his veins. Slowly he opened his eyes only to close them again the brightness in the room burned his eyes. He didn't know where he was but he wasn't in the basement anymore and after so long of being in the dark the light hurt his eyes. He brought his hands up over his eyes trying to block out the light.

"Deeks?"

"Hurts… bright."

Kensi understood what Deeks meant so she got up and flicked the lights off and then came back to her place.

"It's okay the lights are off you can open your eyes."

Slowly Deeks removed his hands from his eyes and started to open them. The room was darker but there was still some light coming into the room. It was enough though for him to be able to look around and figure out where he was. He knew he wasn't in the basement anymore and he heard Kensi's voice. Even still his mind wouldn't calm down he couldn't focus on anything other than Jose coming after him. Deeks pushed himself up so he was sitting up now and could clearly see that he was in a hospital room. He was in a hospital and Jose was out there somewhere probably looking for him right now. Kensi saw the look on Deeks' face and knew that he was panicking he had spent the last eight months being tortured it only made sense that he would be having issues especially after waking up in a strange place.

"Deeks calm down its ok you're safe. We're in a hospital in LA right now."

"No I can't be here I have to go… I have to go home."

Deeks felt like he couldn't breathe he just wanted out of there. He looked down at his hand and noticed the needle from the IV in his skin seeing the needle pushed him over the edge. He pulled it out not caring if it caused any more pain to his body or not. He was shaking and breathing was becoming more difficult as his pace quickened. Kensi stood up she needed to calm him down before he did any damage to his body.

"Deeks calm down just breath it's ok you're safe. We're in the hospital back in LA you are safe."

It wasn't working though no matter what she did she couldn't get him to calm down. Nurses came into the room which only made him worse. He was shaking and hyperventilating with the closeness of all the people in the room. Kensi asked if they could give him something but they couldn't with the level of heroin still in his system. Finally after an hour of fighting to keep Deeks in the room, who was now standing trying to get pass the nurses and Kensi so he could leave, she was relieved when Callen called. After another fifteen minutes Callen and Sam walked into the room. They were standing in the doorway just looking into the room Deeks was standing basically in the far left corner of the room where Kensi and six other nurses were crowding him. Deeks was shaking and hyperventilating with the closeness of everyone in the room. Sam immediately saw what was going on and didn't waste a second to intervene before it got too far and Deeks hurts someone or himself.

"Everyone get away from him just back off."

"Sir we need to calm him down." One of the nurses said

"I will calm him down all of you out of the room it's only making him worse. Just leave him alone now."

Sam was getting annoyed with the nurses they were clearly out of their league and just needed to step down and let him handle it. He knew what was wrong with Deeks he had seen it many times before especially while he was a SEAL. Some of the nurses made their way out of the room clearly not brave enough to go up against someone Sam's size but a couple still held their grounds.

"Sir let us do our jobs."

"He's having a flashback he doesn't know what's going on and the heroin in his system is making it all that much worse. This isn't your job you can't fix him but I can so get the hell out."

Finally after that the last of the nurses walked out of the room leaving just Kensi standing by Deeks.

"Kensi come back here the more people around him the worse he'll get right now. Just trust me."

Kensi gave one last look to her partner then walked over to join Callen by the door while Sam walked over slowly. He knew what he needed to do he had done it before and he had gone through it before even. This wasn't going to be easy or pleasant at first but it would help in the end. Slowly Sam walked over to Deeks and grabbed him into a hug making sure he held on to the now struggling Deeks.

"Deeks listen to me listen to my voice. You are not in that basement it's me Sam we spoke on the phone remember? You called Hetty and we got you out we found you. You're in the hospital now and you're safe."

Deeks was trying to fight against Sam it was a losing battle but he couldn't help it.

"Let me go please just let me go."

"Shh breathe just breathe it's Sam you're safe it's over. You are not in that basement anymore."

Sam just kept repeating that sentence over and over again while Deeks continued his weak struggle to get free. Finally after ten minutes Deeks couldn't take it anymore and the tears started to come as Sam's words made it's into his head. The exhaustion and the tears took his toll and he was no longer able to stand. Sam was still holding onto Deeks when he felt Deeks start to collapse he held onto him and lowered them both to the ground. He pulled Deeks close to his chest and held onto him as he cried as the reality finally took effect in his broken mind.

"It's okay Deeks I got you. It's over now we're gonna get you better."

Sam just held onto Deeks as he let out the last eight months of hell. He just kept telling Deeks the same thing that he was safe now. Sam knew that wasn't entirely true but Deeks didn't need to know that Martinez was still out there they would take care of that. If Deeks knew the truth it would push him over the edge and they wouldn't be able to get him under control. Right now Deeks needed to focus on getting healthy and they would worry about finding Martinez. After a good ten minutes Deeks finally started to calm down as the tears slowed. Callen and Kensi just stood by the door watching everything that was happening. They were both worried about how Deeks broke down even Kensi was surprised that Deeks started to cry in Sam's arms she honestly didn't expect that. Once Deeks was calm down Sam helped him up off the floor and back into bed Sam sat down on the bed next to him while Callen and Kensi stood at the end of the bed.

"When can I go home?"

"The doctor said in a few days you've only been here for about eight hours." Sam answered

"Why can't I talk right?"

"There is some minor damage to your vocal cords but it's only temporary all of your injuries are temporary. You're basically just going to be really sore for a few weeks. They found high levels of heroin in your blood doctor says in a few days you'll be going through withdrawals but by then you should be home. That won't make the withdrawals any easier but at least you'll be more comfortable. Aside from that you'll just be really tired for a little while you're body needs to play catch up from the lack of sleep."

"You probably should get the IV put back in you were dehydrated when you came in." Callen said

"No no needles please no more needles."

"Ok no needles. Hetty is on her way here she said she needed to take care of something first but then she was coming here to see you. She needs to talk to you about what happened." Sam explained.

"I don't understand why I can't just go home."

"You have a serious concussion they just want to keep an eye on you to make sure there are no complications from that." Kensi said softly almost afraid that speaking too loud would scare him away.

"How long was I gone for?"

"It's been eight months you don't remember?" Sam asked gently the look in Deeks' eyes were truly heartbreaking. He looked so confused, so lost and so broken. That really was the only word Sam could think of to describe him right now, broken.

"I thought it had only been two months it's all just one big blur."

"It'll take some time for your memories to come back. The doctor says once the heroin is out of your system you'll remember more."

"I don't want to remember."

No one said anything to that. No one knew what to say to that. They could understand Deeks desire for not wanting to remember if it were any one of them they wouldn't want to remember either. They were so use to Deeks sounding so happy and making jokes. Sure every now and then he got serious and you saw the rage in his eyes, but this was different. He was in pain and scared and genuinely lost. It was clear that he didn't know what to do or where to go from here he didn't know how to get past everything that happened. Even worse that he would have more memories that he would have to deal with as the heroin left his system. Callen decided to break the silence.

"Why are the lights off?"

"I turned them off for him." Kensi said

"The light hurts it burns my eyes. It was always dark down there and cold. The light burns."

"It will get better you just have to introduce your eyes to the light slowly. But they will get used to it again. I know that it burns a lot when I was a SEAL we went on this mission and we literally spent a week in this pitch black cave trying to hide from the enemy. We were completely outnumbered and had to wait for back up. After spending a week in total darkness walking out of that cave it felt like my eyes were on fire. You just have to start with dim lights and work your way back up."

"How…how did you find me?"

"You called Hetty's cell phone Eric traced the call and that lead us to the house you were being kept in. You don't remember calling?" Sam asked gently he knew he needed to keep his voice even and gentle so he didn't scare Deeks.

"No I don't remember much of the time there. What I do remember I don't want to."

"Well that's perfectly understandable Mr. Deeks."

They all turned around to find Hetty and Nate standing in the doorway.

"Nate what are you doing here?" Kensi asked as she went to give him a hug.

"Hetty called me said she needed me back here for a little while."

"Nice to see you're alive and well Nate." Callen said as he shook Nate's hand.

"Good to see you Nate." Sam said as he to stuck his hand out to shake Nate's

"It's good to be back. How are you feeling Marty?"

"I'm fine"

It was an immediate response that he had ever since he was a little kid and his father's beating put him in a hospital. Nate didn't comment on that he would have time to get into that a little later on.

"Mr. Deeks I need to ask you a few questions if you're feeling up to it?"

"O….Ok"

"You don't have to go into detail I just need the basics. Do you remember when the operation took a turn for the worse?"

"I got a motel room around two in the morning I guess that would technically be day one. Later that night I went to the bar they always go to everything was going fine. Martinez invited me back to his place for a party everything was going fine…then…then"

Deeks' breathing started to quicken and it was clear he was on the verge of a panic attack. Sam immediately jumped in he knew Deeks was fighting the memory.

"Deeks look at me."

Deeks lifted his eyes so they would meet Sam's.

"Where are you right now?"

"Hospital"

"That's right you are in the hospital you are not in that basement anymore. Just breathe nice and slow deep breaths."

Deeks did as Sam said and took slow deep breaths to calm his breathing down. Just thinking about what happened to him was too much for him to handle. Nate kept quiet and just watched as Sam was able to calm Deeks down which was impressive. Bate had read over Deeks medical file he knew what happened to him so for him to trust Sam the way he does still was interesting. Once Deeks was calmed down again Hetty spoke.

"So that first night is when it went downhill?"

Deeks just gave a nod hoping she wouldn't ask him about it anymore.

"I spoke with your Lieutenant he didn't say much but he did say that you had contacted him three times is that correct?"

"Ya um I'm not really too sure when I called exactly but I remember being able to call three times."

"Can you tell me about the phone conversations?"

"They were all pretty much the same I told him I needed help. He asked if they were hurting me I told him yes. He said he would work on sending someone but I guess he never did."

"No Mr. Deeks he didn't but what is important right now is for you to get better. I have one more question for you what was the bar called?"

"Cross Roads. Why?"

"Because I want to make sure we got everyone you said that was the bar they always go to. So I can send in agents to make more arrests. I don't want you to worry though you are safe now I have killed your alias so any remaining cartel out there won't come looking for you. Do you have any questions for me?"

"Can I go home?"

"I can speak with your doctor and see what he says, but you need to stay here until he says it's ok for you to leave. Now can I see you all in the hallway please."

Deeks looked over at Sam and for a second Sam could see panic in Deeks' eyes. He felt safe around him and Sam couldn't help but wonder why. After everything he had been through it really didn't make sense to him.

"It's alright I'll be back in a few minutes. You should lay down try and get some sleep."

Before Sam left he picked up a cup and poured some water into it then placed it on the side table so Deeks could grab it.

"You need to drink lots of water to keep hydrated especially now that the IV is out."

After a nod from Deeks they all left the room and went out into the hallway. Nate made sure he looked at all their faces as they entered the hallway. It was clear in all of the agents' eyes that they were deeply concerned about their friend. Nate couldn't blame them they didn't understand Deeks' behaviour like he did after all that was his job.

"Is he ever going to be okay?" Kensi couldn't help but ask to no one in particular.

"It will take time but eventually he will be alright. I know you all have questions and I will do my best to answer them for you." Nate said

"I guess I'm just confused when he woke up he was ok for a few minutes but then he lost it. I tried to calm him down and so did nurses. I'm not surprised that he was having a hard time but I guess I'm shocked that Sam was the one that calmed him down and not me."

"I have to admit I'm surprised to I knew the moment I saw him what was wrong that he was having a flashback. I didn't expect him to respond the way he did. After what they did to him I didn't expect that he would trust being around other men." Sam said

"With male rape victims they can go one of two ways. The most common is that they don't trust other men and can't handle being around them and especially touched by them. The other way is that they don't trust most males, but there are a couple that they do trust and feel safe around. In Marty's case he's the later. He has spent eight months at the mercy of these men and whether he remembers right now or not Sam you were the one to save him. You are the first person that got him out and in his mind you got him safe. His conscious mind doesn't remember right now but his subconscious mind does remember. He trusts you in his mind no one can hurt him while you are around and that goes for Callen as well. You will notice that Marty is different when he is around the both of you compared to being alone with Kensi. It's important that you don't take that personally either Kensi you and Marty have a strong partnership. However in his mind that doesn't mean that he isn't worried about you and your safety."

"Why would he be worried about my safety?"

"Think about where he was for the last eight months what he's been through. He wasn't strong enough to stop them. We have all seen him fight he can hold his own the fact that he couldn't that first night tells me that there was at least four of them. This cartel gangs up on their victims he knows that just like he knows that if someone comes looking for him there will be a gang of them. He doesn't want you to go through any of what he went through. So when it's just you and him he'll be more on edge then he will be when Callen or Sam are around."

"So what do we do?" Callen asked

"Right now normalcy is key to getting Marty back on track. Which is why I think mentally and emotionally the best thing for him is to be back at home. I would like to speak with his Doctor and see if we can come to some sort of agreement on when he can go home. Honestly the sooner he gets back home where he is around his things; his bed where he can shower and be alone when he wants to be is going to help a lot. The next main step is getting clean and off the heroin. I know Marty is very anti-drugs I don't think I've seen him take a Tylenol so getting him clan and dealing with the fact that he is a drug addict is a big important step. He needs to understand that even though the drugs were forced into him he is still technically a drug addict and needs help for that. With the Heroin coming out of his system it will open his mind back up and the memories will come back to him. Which will cause more flashbacks some may be minor others can be very dangerous to himself and others. So making sure he doesn't have a gun in his house would be helpful just in case. He won't use it on purpose but the flashbacks can be very realistic and he might not even recognize who is talking to him all he will see if what happened."

"So we just act like this didn't happen?" Kensi asked

"No acting like this didn't happen is only going to make it worse. What he needs is his life back he needs to be home where he feels comfortable especially with the withdrawals. He needs to have Monty there and go to the beach and surf when he can physically again. He needs to get back into his normal life what you guys can do is act around him like you normally would. If he jokes with you joke back don't act like what happened has changed your opinions of him. Don't force him to talk about what happened but don't turn the conversation away either if he brings it up. You will find that just being there will help greatly. Most importantly know when to walk away with the withdrawals he will yell and say horrible things to whoever is there and tell you to leave. Walk away from the room but don't leave him he doesn't really want you to leave it's just the withdrawals he can't control it. Keep in mind there will be times when he does need to be alone in his own place in which case leave for a little while then come back. It's important that when you come over call first and ask him he needs to have some control back in his life."

"One day at a time right." Sam said

"That's exactly it Mr. Hanna we need to look at this one day at a time. I would like to find his doctor and speak with him about when Mr. Deeks can leave. In the meantime Mr. Callen why don't you and Ms. Blye go back to the mission and set up a raid on the bar for this evening we might lucky out and find Mr. Martinez there. Mr. Hannah stay with Mr. Deeks for now while Mr. Getz and I speak with Doctor Thomas. Mr. Deeks seems to be the most comfortable around you right now."

"Alright" Sam agreed

"We will keep in touch and let you know how it goes." Callen said

"We will do the same." Nate said

With that being said they all went their separate ways each one knowing it was going to be a long night for them all.


End file.
